The Dark Emperor Manifesto

Switch Captain Malcolm Reynolds and Captain Jack Sparrow. Watch your creation dance.

I’ll tell you, “Our Mrs. Reynolds” would be quite different. And special.

I’ve barely worked on my February Writing Goals. All I got done was the short story.

Crap. Crap. Crap. Fuck. Crap.

…That I really fucking love elephants?

Got “The Spacecar” back today — and I must truly say, this was the very best and most flattering rejection letter I’ve ever gotten. (I’ve been told by some who skim my blog that they think I’m being sarcastic when I say things like this, so let me assure you that this is not the case; I understand and embrace that rejections are like 80% of the writerly mojo).

Andromeda Spaceways seemed to really like the story. Here’re the opening lines of the rejection notice:

 ”Thank you for submitting to Andromeda Spaceways. 

 Unfortunately, while we liked your submission, so far we have not found a place for it … and it is against our policy to hold onto a story indefinitely. Much as we’d like to, we just don’t have the room to print all the stories we get — not even all the good ones. So sadly, I’m going to have to very reluctantly let this one go.

If it got this far, you can rest assured that your story is of high quality and you should be able to find a home for it. I look forward to hearing from you again.

Better luck next time!”

There was also a short list of their observations about the story, mostly things they liked, I’m happy to say. Only real criticisms were that some sentences were too long and descriptive, probably to the point of confusion, but I have been regularly attending my Long and Circuitous Sentence Writers Anonymous meetings, and I think they’ve doing me some good. Also, one individual opined that I could have done with fewer mentions of different alien species and, I’m sorry to say, that is just not changing, because it’s my favorite bit. :P

Lastly, I’d like to thank Andromeda Spaceways Inflight Magazine (visit them here: http://www.andromedaspaceways.com/) for reviewing and so closely considering my story, for providing it with a home for the last few months, and for giving me hope that I’m not just kidding myself as to my authorly abilities. Overall, I felt the process enjoyable, and will definitely be sending stories their way again.

Now to buff “The Spacecar” up and send it somewhere else!

— Adam 

Is Rufus from “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure” a Time Lord?

…When you’ve written a full page of boring, draggy exposition for a new short story, and then suddenly figure out how to condense it all down to one much more interesting sentence. It’s GREAT! I’ve been writing short stories for five years, and I feel like I’m only just now really beginning to get the hang of it. Perhaps I’ll post more on the subject later.

The writing of “(WT)In This Universe” is going damn well indeed.  :D

Adam 

Only took took a month-and-a-rollerblading-half.

Think I might get rid of the first page. I’ve determined that short stories are best to be brief, and I do nothing if not wax verbose. I think, perhaps, that our hero’s circumstances could well be explained without the benefit of a page and some change of exposition in a different setting and introducing not necessarily necessary characters.

Also, I need to contact someone who knows some Ancient Greek. I have a friend who can help me, but I’ll be needing to find a professor or something to check the work.

Fun times. Perhaps I can get this sent off soon.

Yours From the Shore of the Mighty Styx,
Adam 

The day that Darwin comes around in his sleigh pulled by eight distinct species of Galapagos finch and gives all the good little biologists and paleoanthropologists gifts of transition fossils and barbed responses to creation science.

His elves include Huxley, Wallace, Mendel, and Louis Leakey. 

See what I mean? See!? I’ve got a whole list of writing things to do, and here I am doing none of it. One day I’m going to get an agent and make them very, very insane.

It’s been a while, but it’s worth it. I need to have more short stories out, plain and simple.

Liked it, though. It’s science-y

Love and Lava

My love, like a volcano, spurns
And puzzles the scholastic
My desire like the crater burns
My passion, pyroclastic.

Your woes, like frightened farmers, flee
From numerous ejections
Which bury villas by the sea
In layers of affections 

Any, you know, any time now.

Signed,
An Author(?) 

Goals for teh Febs are as follows:

• Write “In This Universe” (working title)
• Finish Dark Emperor (ha!)
• Prep “The Johnsons” and “The Wedge” for publication
• Write to Chapter 3 in Shadow House (I expect there to be a fitting thirteen chapters in total)
• Start writing unnamed YouTube series
• Outline Firefly fan comic. Maybe start drawing :)
• Send “The Spacecar” somewhere else (if they ever get back to me :P)
• Maybe find someone to illustrate my comics and children’s book.

I know it seems like a lot as compared to last month, but it’s mostly small stuff. Let’s see how I measure up.

At the beginning of January, I posted a checklist of writing to complete by month’s end. Now, if you know me, you know how distracted I get. So let’s take a look at how it all panned out:

• Write “The Wedge”. - Check. First week of January, in fact. Here’s the thing, though: I got bored halfway through typing it onto the computer from my notebook. So it’s still chilling on my desktop, half typed out.
• Edit “Johnsonworld” (working title) for publication. - Not check. Still not certain if I even want to do this.
• Finish Dark Emperor novel. - Ha ha. No. I’ll be working on this novel til the day I die.
• Start on children’s horror novel(la?). - Check. Also, I’m using the working title “Shadow House” for now. May keep it. Dunno yet.
• Write pilot for unnamed animated YouTube show. - Yes/No. After a talk with my good friend and creative collaborator Brian, I decided after my initial post that it would be best to write the entire series at once and break it up into episodes after the whole thing is written. So no, I did not write the pilot. But I did plan the entire thing out in great detail.

 SOOO, that’s it for now. Got to get ready for work, but I’ll try and have a goal list for February up before midnight.

Best,
Adam 

Indicate precisely what you mean to say.

Yours Sincerely,
Wasting Away 

…that’s when you know you’re a writer.

Or. You know. A serial killer.